Vampires. Like all of us, they have their positives and their negatives. Here those are:
Key: ‘*’ indicates a pun
Can use pointy teeth as a fixed compass, comparing distances on blueprints or treasure-hunt maps.
Ability to become mist allows them to ogle girls showering.
Taste in films is shit, shit, shit.
If you are a guy in a relationship with a vampire/vampiress, they basically can’t give you oral sex. It basically can’t be done. Which blows*. Which just sucks*, you know?