W.A.S. Ad Solutions Networks

We have started a solutions networks for advertisers! If you’re an advertiser, or know someone who is, or is affiliated with one, or if you’re affiliated with one, and if it’s solutions you/they/she/he/it are after, look no further than our “networks.”™ We offer an adaptable, highly-rigid set of solutions developed over many years of industry experience and experimentation. Our list of clients speaks for itself:

• Jumanji
• Eric Idle (Monty Python, Spamalot)
• Boston Public Sewer System

Ask yourself this: Do you want ads that grab the attention of potential clients and won’t let go? That shake potential clients like a dog shakes a rabbit? That ingest clients whole like in the snake–rat arrangement? Let us revivify your dying brand. Here’s what we did for Google, a popular search engine whose quiet, lackluster ads littered New York City subway stations for months:

Our "murder" concept revivified Google's moribund subway campaign.

Two weeks after we tweaked the flaccid copy on Google’s subway posters — “juiced it and goosed it”™ — whatever service it was they were trying to sell experienced a sudden jump in impressions, engagement, awareness, and money happening™.

The results speak for themselves. And they speak volumes. Isn’t it time you gave your product the edge it needs to drive consumers down the purchase funnel toward longterm loyalty? Do you want customers, or brand ambassadors? The answers are — or should be — obvious. Or what, are you a turncoat piece of shit working covertly for a competitor?

2 responses on “W.A.S. Ad Solutions Networks

  1. David Curley

    Warmest Greetings Advertising Virtuoso(s),

    Hello. I represent 1/4 of a small conglomerate by the name of Otherkin. Based in Dublin, Ireland, our main focus is within the alternative rock scene, performing as a band, etc. etc. We also fit pipe works, perform minor surgeries, CAN* use microsoft paint, and are somewhat proficient in bed making**.

    Now, before I bore you with details, let me provide you with some more information. There are 4 of us, each with a personality and ego to match the last. Hence, our fights are long, drawn out, wimpy in appearance, and a regular feature in our day to day lives.

    But let’s get down to brass tacs. We mean big business. I’m talking the London Shard on top of the Burj Khalifa times 10, to the moon; eat your heart out kind of big, i.e. physically large and intimidating. Our most recent product is titled “As a High”, and comes in mp3, scent, and lifestyle formats. Your expertise and cunning could however make our soon to be released follow up “Lockjaw” that touch more gargantuan – consider it win win.

    Well my dear boys, I thank you for your time, your grace, and your to-be swift and prompt reply.

    Kind Regards
    David Anthony Curley

    _______________________________________________

    *Subject to the definition of “can”.
    **This is untrue.

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