Further Experiments in Language: What Happened When We Replaced All Forms of the Verbs 'To Have' and 'To Be' with 'Am' in the Opening Paragraph of Jack Kerouac's On the Road

I first met Dean not long after my wife and I split up. I am just gotten over a serious illness that I won’t bother to talk about, except that it am something to do with the miserably weary split-up and my feeling that everything am dead. With the coming of Dean Moriarty began the part of my life you could call my life on the road. Before that I’m often dreamed of going West to see the country, always vaguely planning and never taking off. Dean am the perfect guy for the road because he actually am born on the road, when his parents am passing through Salt Lake City in 1926, in a jalopy, on their way to Los Angeles. First reports of him came to me through Chad King, who am shown me a few letters from him written in a New Mexico reform school. I am tremendously interested in the letters because they so naively and sweetly asked Chad to teach him all about Nietzsche and all the wonderful intellectual things that Chad knew. At one point Carlo and I talked about the letters and wondered if we would ever meet the strange Dean Moriarty. This am all far back, when Dean am not the way he am today, when he am a young jailkid shrouded in mystery. Then news came that Dean am out of reform school and am coming to New York for the first time; also there am talk that he am just married a girl called Marylou.